The Secret Garden

So tonight I started reading, The Secret Garden to the children. I'd forgotten how the book begins and was berated with question after question.  

Why didn't Mary's mother love her? Why do they keep saying that Mary was ugly? What does cross mean? What does contrary mean? Was Mary ugly because she was cross and contrary? Why were they in India? Why does Mary's mother have so many nicknames? Why would Mary drink wine off the table? Doesn't she know she can't drink alcohol? How could they just forget about her and leave her home alone?

And of course all of this led to a huge explanation of the cholera epidemic. Which led to more questions, because Reese threw up last night, and now she thinks it's cholera from eating the snow. 

I'm ruining my children. 

The last question came from Quincy when we were on page 16, 

"Mom, how come all the books and movies about orphans or kids with dead mothers?" 

I don't know the answer to that one but it seems to be true. Harry Potter, Annie, Pippy Longstocking, Snow Buddies, Cabbage Patch Christmas, peter and the Starcatchers, Lemony Snicket's: A Series of Unfortunate Events...even Buddy in Elf was an orphan.

Instead of drifting off to sleep thinking about the poor orphans this time, they'll fall asleep to sweet dreams of cholera. Lovely.

1 hour of reading and only 16 pages covered. 

The Secret Garden is going to last us a while, I think. 

Some Stuff

I have several posts drafted, but want to add the photos and since I seem to have misplaced the USB cord for our camera, you're getting a miscellaneous collection of cell phone pics and random information. 

1) "October, Rock-tober, my favorite time of year!" The girls sing this song daily even though it is no longer October.  Mr. L is the girls' favorite teacher at Cooper (side note: he looks a whole lot like Tobias Funke from Arrested Development) and they look forward to music time with him every week. He has a ridiculously dry personality, but when this song comes on, he comes to life and dances around the room.  

2) Reese and Quincy started tennis lessons at the fitness center.  Reese loves it and she loves that her friends, Jackson and Hannah, are in the class with her.  Quincy does not enjoy tennis as much, but I think that has a lot to do with her confusion over which hand to hold her racket with.  Last week, I noticed she was getting particularly frustrated and kept missing the ball.  I poked my head out onto the court and suggested that she switch hands and she did a lot better.  She whines about going, but once she is there she always has fun.  

3) Reese was the October Terrific Kid for Mrs. Snieski's class.  This is the second time she has been a Terrific Kid at Cooper and she was really excited.  Aaron and I went to the assembly to watch her receive her award and Aaron had the special reward lunch with her on the stage. Way to go, Reese!

4)  This photo pretty much sums up our life last week.  Yes. That is exactly what it looks like.

5) Soren is awesome. Aaron's coworker, Ericka, bought this outfit for him, and Scott and Kristie sent him the hat.

6) Quincy went to the pediatric dentist to have 2 small cavities filled last week. Unfortunately, the dentist's office is like disneyland (TVs on ceiling, laughing gas, treasure towers and stickers galore) and she has no understanding of how frustrating it is to spend $190 on filings instead of something cool like a carpet shampooer (if you don't understand why that is a necessity, please refer to #4 listed above)

After her dental appointment, her face was still totally numb and Quincy kept biting her lips and cheeks.  Obviously, I couldn't send her back to school until the drugs had worn off, and she hadn't eaten lunch yet, so we needed to go someplace to keep her entertained until she wasn't giggly and numb anymore. I had a bag full of chuck e cheese tokens burning a hole in the glove box (thank you, Grandma Lynda) so we went there to play for awhile.  Basically Quincy learned that cavities = a day of  super fun times with mom instead of going to school.  Mother of the Year.

7) The tomatoes are slowly ripening up and I've made several batches of tomato basil and red pepper soup. Yum.

8) Corbin takes swimming lessons while the girls are in tennis.  He loves it, and aside from the first day (when this pic was taken) there is usually only one other kid there each week, so it's like getting a private lesson.

9) We decorated for Halloween and Homeless Hannah put hexes on all of us.

10)  Best baby ever. He slept from 5-10pm yesterday, then I fed him and put him to bed and he slept until 8am. Then I fed him and he slept until 11.  He has an icky cold. It sucks.  He still wins for best baby I've ever known.  He's like a wheezy little koala bear.  All he does is snuggle, sleep, and eat.  Not every night is as uninterrupted as last night, but I probably get a 6 hour stretch 5 out of 7 nights a week.

11) more pics to come, but here is a taste of my halloween costume.

12) I guess I should mention that occasionally Soren wakes up and smiles or plays with toys, or in the case of the photo below, poops. At the doctor yesterday he measured 24 inches long and weighed 12 lbs 15 ounces...or as we like to describe him, "petite and delicate" ;)

13) I'm 70% through Pope Joan: a novel by Donna Woolfolk Cross and so far I really like it.  Someone read it so we can talk about it!

14)  Even though I'm getting enough sleep at night I am completely exhausted all of the time.

15) It wsa 70* last weekend and Aaron took the boat out and it actually worked.  Update: I still hate the boat with the fire of 1,000 suns.

16) Corbin was coughing all last weekend and Soren has been coughing this week.  Yesterday, Reese threw up 7 times.  We had a Harry Potter Movie Marathon and I let her watch the 4th one today. She wasn't scared, surprisingly.  When I took the movie out of the dvd player I realized it is PG-13.  Mother of the Year!

17) I still have not seen the 4th Twilight movie and have zero desire to see the 5th.

18) Aaron and I are loving the Marketplace in Springdale as our new dinner date spot.  The chocolate mess with peanut butter sauce is killer. So is the buttery bread. So is the blueberry vinaigrette. So are the fried chicken and sweet potato fries. I need to go back.

19) I was in charge of the October and November Relief Society enrichment meetings.  They were fun to plan and put together and we had a good turn out. I'll post pictures when I find the camera cord.

20) we harvested sweet potatoes!  They are long and skinny and look a bit like fat carrots or fingerling potatoes. Can't wait to eat them.  Other than the oregano, thyme, rosemary, several onions, a handfull of peas, and some cilantro, the garden is done until spring. Boo Hiss.

21) I miss California a LOT lately.  I want my family to meet my baby.  I miss my brothers and sisters and I wish my kids could be near their cousins.  Arkansas is a beautiful, fantastic, wonderful place to live 9 months out of the year. We're headed into the winter months and I am dreading it. I don't like to be cold, and ever since I had Soren I have been freezing.  I think I got used to dying of heat in the summer and now it is cool and I don't have an extra 40 lbs keeping me warm. I'm super cold all of the time. Aaron and I have a pact that we won't travel at Christmas again until all of our children are old enough to carry their own suitcases. I LOATHE flying during the holidays but I'm ready to cave on this pact due to a trifecta of reasons:
-I haven't been "home" for Christmas in 7 years. Arkansas feels like home to me now, but I miss having Christmas with my family.
-All of my brothers and sisters will be there this year.  I'm dying to meet my new nephew, Ben.
-Aaron has not used any of his paternity leave so we actually have time off available this year. Our summer vacation will be spent in Utah this year (unless we can convince the Willys to go to newport beach instead so we could have the best of both worlds), so I think winter in Ca sounds warm and dreamy.

22) Dear Santa: Les Mis is on tour and I want to go.

23) Aaron is not easy to shop for. The only thing he wants is a tv.  I think Santa should hold out on a new tv until the boat is out of the garage and I don't have to back out into the driveway just to get all of the kids buckled.

24) We actually reached our family $10,000 out of pocket max and our health care for the rest of 2012 is officially covered!  Just in time, too....Soren's latest bill was $12,000. Free doctor visits for the next 60 days!  It's incredible. We've finally made appointments for the dermatologist and podiatrist.   I am so grateful for Aaron's job and that we've chosen to invest in health insurance.
I'm also grateful for mad bargaining skills.  That saying, "You don't receive if you don't ask" is totally true.  Aaron went to the ER for a possible blood clot the night we brought Soren home from the hospital.  I called the hospital billing office last week and asked them if they'd give me a 20% discount on the bill if I paid the full balance in cash right then over the phone.

$700 saved. Just for asking.

25) I am trying REALLY hard to convince my family that we should kill and eat one of our hens for thanksgiving dinner.

26) Quincy got up at 4am this morning and not only downright REFUSED to go back to bed, but turned on lights and threw a tantrum until everyone in the house was awake.  Not cool, Q.  She's been begging to go to sleep since 3:30 this afternoon and I am being mean and making her stay awake until 6:30 so she learns to quit waking everyone up at ridiculous hours. She is SO mad at me right now and keeps falling asleep on the floor, at the kitchen table, in the bathroom, etc.  I gave Reese and Corbin balloons and permission to "bop" her on the head with them every time she closes her eyes.

And now she knows what it feels like to have someone wake you up in a super annoying way when there's nothing in the world you'd rather do more than curl up and go back to sleep.  It's hilarious to see them attack her with balloons every 2 minutes.  I'm realizing as I type this out how terrible it sounds....but it's working, so whatev. 4am, people. 4am.

Goose Egg

Boy + wooden headboard = hematoma (aka "on Sundays we wrestle, part II")

A trip to the dentist

revealed that someone has a couple of cavities...  

Ahem...pay no attention to the fact that she wore two left flip flops (in different sizes) to the appointment.  She's fancy.

While I was sleeping

The children were documenting their neglect on film.
I woke up to several 4-8 second "Blair Witch Project" blurry video clips of what my vagabond kids saw as they ran wild and unsupervised through the house, this morning.

And there I am in the videos in all my uneditied glory, totally sleeping in the background--- with a puke bowl on my lap.
Hey, at least they can entertain themselves creatively?

Please don't call CPS.

How I managed to sleep in until 9am the other day

even though the kids were up before the sun. Many thanks go out to Calamity Jane for that one.

Speaking of Calamity Jane... if I could take Doris Day and and Julie Andrews circa Maria Von Trapp/Mary Poppins....(ok NOT Julie Andrews the person, but Julie Andrews as Fraulein Maria and Mary Poppins) and mash them into one person, the outcome would totally be my idol.

Thanks to technology, Doris Day was available to "whip-crack-away" my kids into a sweet television coma, and I got my own little coma on.

There are few things a mother cherishes more than an unexpected extra 3 hours of sleep.

It was Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.

General Conference Weekend

Lest any of you believe I am a perfect parent (wait...does anyone actually think this? Have I fooled someone? Can we be BFFs?), I thought I'd post the only picture I took from our Backyard Campout, this weekend.



And why didn't I take more pictures?
Because it was a semi-disaster, that's why.


Despite (or we like to believe it was to spite) our best efforts we discovered:
1) that I am officially not a camper.
2) that my children definitely are not campers.


Friday night was an epic fail. (notice the default dinner--- GV mac n cheese with cut up hot dogs.).

Oh and then there was the campfire. Oh the fire! I won't go into detail, but all I can say is that there is now an 18 inch circle of completely charred grass in the back lawn. It's like a horrifible (yes, I know HORRIFIBLE is not a word. I made it up. Horrific+Horrible = horrifible) tattoo to remind Aaron and I of our night of stupidity.

Stupidity meaning we thought we could spontaneously set up a tent and campfire in the backyard, and have a practice run "camping trip" with the kids and all would go well, the children would be delighted, and we would all get a good comfortable night's sleep and awake chipper and full of love and affection for one another in the morning.
Family togetherness...isn't this what all of you camper people swear will happen?

You folks are liars, I will tell you that right now.

For the non-campers out there, let's be real for a minute. You can count on me to tell you the truth.


Camping sucks, y'all.


Corbin crapped out on this idea about 8:30 pm and Aaron took him inside and put him in his crib where he promptly fell asleep before the door to his bedroom had even been closed....and then Aaron promptly fell asleep on the living room sofa and never actually made it back outside.

The girls were determined to remain strong and stick it out in the tent.


It was freaking freezing.


Camping is COLD! We huddled together under the covers and Quincy put her ice dagger feet under my shirt like 100 times and I am proud to say I refrained from cursing.

To silence---er "distract" the girls from their whining, I decided to cheat and got out the portable dvd player (you know, to completely contradict the purpose of camping by drowning out the elements of nature with the all natural sounds Harry Potter. Let me assure you that I felt like a "Prisoner of Azkaban" on Friday night).


This worked for about 30 minutes.
Unfortunately, it was Bikes, Blues and BBQ weekend, and every two minutes, a Harley Davidson chopper would chug past our house, deafen my children, startle the crap out of us, drown out the movie, cause at least one child to cry, aaaaand remind us that we were outside, spooned uncomfortably into an air mattress and blanket taco, and freezing our cans off when our warm, non plasticy non backyard-smelly non bugg-buzzy non firepit-smokey non motorcycle choppy and quite cozy beds were 30 feet away.
Unable to cast a patronus charm to keep away the icy breathed, joy sucking dementors that encircled us, we gave up at 10:30pm and came inside to thaw out and sleep in our own beds.


I know.
We are weak.
All of you real campers, (read: liars who say camping is fun to trick us into doing something stupid when we could be warm, comfortable, and still like each other) are saying, "Nice try, Willys, nice try."


What I think you are saying is, "bwhahaha! Suckas!"

It wasn't all terrible. A few good things came out of this:

-We learned not to go camping again, this year.

-We were able to teach the children about King Benjamin and how multitudes traveled far distances and camped in tents to be able to hear his counsel. This lesson helped get the kids excited to watch General Conference give modern day counsel AND

-We realized how blessed we are to be able to have the words of our leaders available to us through television, Internet, and magazines and how lucky we are to NOT have to travel and camp out to hear them. I. do. not. know. if we would survive!

General Conference will happen again the first weekend in April and we are looking forward to it. Conference was amazing and inspiring, so for the most part, the weekend was a win....except for that whole camping thing.

Today

-the ants found the honey jar.

-Corbin bit through the peels and into the end of every banana on the counter.

-is Reese's last day of school! Woooot!

-the girls are planning a sleepover at Grandma and Grandpa's

-we finally attached the rest of the pergola to the house

-we will have snowcones and watermelon after school

-we are harvesting spinach and our first zucchini and yellow squash.

-we planted pumpkin seeds

-two bottles of water have been dumped on the living room carpet

-two stuffed animals and a car have been put in the toilet

-Quincy did her own hair and has an assortment of clips hanging from her bangs

-Corbin took an egg from the fridge, shouted, "a ball!" and threw it to my mom.

-I just found a large mysterious spill down the front of my white skirt that looks like a coffee stain. I have no idea.

Good Eats?

I made a double batch of playdough this morning for my preschool.
I came into the kitchen to find Quincy gagging. She spit up a huge wad of playdough that she had tried to eat. Sick.

I can't get the girl to eat a piece of turkey to save her life, but quarters, playdough, and wads of toilet paper? Anytime. Gross.

A Crappy Day. Literally.

Little miss thing still hasn't passed her quarter.

I might have freaked out a little and taken her in for xrays to make sure it wasn't stuck inside her somewhere.

$100 ER visit---check!

exposure to radiation---check!

$fazillion xrays---check!

Just as everyone predicted, I paid a ton of cheddar to have a doctor tell us to go home and wait it out. But I figure, there's always that ONE case. You know, the one where the quarter gets lodged in the esophagus or whatever and has to be surgically removed. The one case where the kid has a terrible allergic reaction to the foreign object they swallowed. I don't want to be the "one case" and wish I had done more to help my daughter.

So we had xrays done, I paid through the roof, and now I have some peace of mind.

You just can't put a price tag on that. Not when it's your baby girl.

Annnnnnnnd there it is! It's in her colon and the ER doc said it should be out in 24-48 hours.

That was 7 days ago.


I've sifted through some serious [expletive] over the past few days.

It was really really gross. Especially since poor Quincy heard the ER doc say it was probably going to hurt to pass the quarter...so she decided to "hold it in" until she couldn't hold it any longer.


My girl has some iron will. Or should I say "nickel will"? "copper will"?
Whatev, she managed to hold it in for 5 days.
TMI? Probably.


And we still have no quarter. She's like a little money pit...the cash goes in, but it isn't coming out.

But during my little treasure hunt, I had to laugh. THIS is motherhood.
Any of you women out there that are expecting your first child, don't read that "What to Expect" nonsense...drive over to the ER. That's where you see the real mothers.

The mother on the phone with the insurance company, trying to settle a crazy bill that wasn't covered for who knows why.

The mother digging into the depths of her bag, desperately trying to find a stray fruity snack or stick ot gum to buy her another 10 minutes of peace while stuck in a waiting room with antsy children.

The mother holding a bowl while her son pukes in it.

The mother being wheeled out to her car with a yummy newborn in her arms. Awwww sweet. Wait, why is she in a wheelchair? 45 minutes of stitches and 2 ice packs, that's why. Maybe a broken tailbone, cracked ribs, or a herniated disc.

The mother that rushes in holding her daughter's teeth in place under a bag of ice.

So yeah, I laughed out loud as I became aware of my one arm in the toilet bowl, and the other holding a toddler on my lap to keep his hands out, and the third child yacking in the corner because she inherited her mother's gag reflex and toilet diving is the epitome of gag worthy tasks.


And then there is Little Q, just standing by, exhilerated, clapping, giggling, and asking,

"Hey, did you find it, Mommy? Can I keep the money?"


They are totally helpless without us, aren't they?
I am totally helpless without them.

I love being a mother.

Snap.

The kids were exposed (like REALLY exposed) to Fifth Disease on Saturday, so I moved preschool to Friday, just to make sure that we are in the clear and don't unknowingly spread it to anyone else. Being quarantined isn't exactly a blast. One might think, that with an unexpected "free" day, I might get a bunch of things accomplished. Not really.

The girls have been fighting all afternoon over anything and everything. I finally put them in separate rooms, and now Corbin keeps going in an biting them.

I finally cleaned out my van. Wow, it was really really gross. The good news is that I found a cd that belongs to a friend of mine that I have searched the car and house top to bottom looking for. It was in it's case, but the case was stuck via melted fruity snack to the inside of the door pocket, so the compartment looked empty at a glance. Tricky. And seriously? Melted fruity snack? Gross. A little Mr. Clean Magic Eraser, and the case is good as new. Ironically, the cd is Dr. Wally's "Healthy Marriage, Happy Family" today? that = bwahahahaha!

It's really amazing that anyone ever lends me anything. Thanks, friends-who-share. I owe you. Seriously, I probably do. Despite my best efforts not to become one, I declare today that I a terrible borrower. Lo Siento.


Yesterday I lost the (new) phone. I had someone call it 100 times until I finally found it. During the 2 minute search, Corbin got out of the tub, ran around the house naked, peed on the carpet, and turned on the dishwasher.

Speaking of the phone, if you call me, tell me who you are when you call. I don't have any contacts saved, and I feel like an idiot for not recognizing your voice right off the bat. Same goes for texts and voicemails.

I've been studying like mad the past 24 hours. I made a deal with my Comm teacher that since I have every point possible in his class, if I can get 100% (which he says is possible but has only happened once in all his years giving this test) on the exam tonight, then all I have to do is show up to put my name on the final and I will get an A in the class. I'd much rather study once, than twice, so I've been glued to the flashcards today every spare moment I've had today...which have been few and far between. The test is a crazy list of vocab words. We get a blank sheet of paper, an hour, and 1 point for every word we remember and spell correctly and 1 point for the definition, word-for-word. I am fully confident that I can ace this test. Memorizing? Sign me up. I've already made an insanely long acronym for the word list so I can remember all of them. Cross yourfingers! I reeeeeeaaaaally do not want to study for a final....which is "comprehensive" and from the book that we have never even opened. I'd love to not open it at all and still get an A in the class. What's that? Show me that 3.9 GPA!

And because I didn't have enough stress today, Quincy decided to increase her value by 25 cents and swallowed a quarter.

Yup.. A quarter. We are going to wait 24 hours to see if she poops it out. If not...off to the hospital to schedule a surgery that, according to my friend, costs several thousands of dollars.

Goodbye RH sofa, hello stupid quarter that I should not have left on the countertop.
Anyone want to rubber-glove it and join me in a byproduct treasure hunt?

Oh, and I got a nice gash in my arm on a rusty corner of our trailer.
At least I am up to date on my dtap.

Gotta go, someone is crying.


Serenity now.

Cooped Up

The coop now has a plywood roof,

trim, a base layer of paint, doors, a vent, and hardware.

I also made this little chicken run one afternoon, this week, in just a couple of hours, (I heart naptime projects that actually get done before naptime is over!) and put the door on the next afternoon. It needs paint, but it's good enough for now.

One thing I am glad that I did is build the doors large enough that one entire side of the run opens, and almost one whole side of the coop opens. Hopefully, this will make for easy cleaning.

Not that I will be the one doing 100% of the cleaning up after these hens. I fully intend on teaching the girls how to clean up after their pets.

The hens aren't complaining, and the kids are loving all the time we've spent outside after school. Reese did a great job helping me paint the coop after school when Corbin and Quincy were both still asleep.


Now, we just need to recruit a bunch of guys to come over, grab a corner, and help us move the coop off the patio and over by the fence. I'll finish the trim, roofing, and paint when we have a day with NO rain in the forecast (so basically, after the next 10 days!)

Uh...he put himself in there. I promise.

Half Full

Today was a rough one.

In an attempt to feel better about it, I've made a list of some of the good things that happened today

1) Like every Sunday, I slept in until 8:30
2) Like every Sunday, Aaron made chocolate chip waffles
3) We went to church
4) We took naps
5) Dinner was excellent
6) It is 6:30pm and all of the children are asleep in their beds
7) My hair looked cute
8) Reese was spotlight in Primary
9) I expected to wake up with sore muscles, but did not.
10) Quincy gave a talk...sort of
11) All of my children have dedicated teachers that nurture them, prepare lessons, and teach them with love
12) Rocky Road ice cream
13) everyone is healthy
14) apple tarts and a visit with friends

I feel better already.

Thumbody to Love

Ok, Moms.
Quincy sucks her thumb when she sleeps.
It doesn't totally bother me, as she isn't the kid who has her thumb in her mouth 24/7, but I also don't want her to be the 10 yr old that still sucks her thumb. I also haven't really found a solution that I'm really happy with to help her to stop this habit. I'm not really in a rush to help her stop, or anything, since it currently doesn't interfere with her ability to do anything.

But it's also one of those "first time" parenting issues where all the seasoned mothers and grandmothers tell me, "don't worry about it. When she's ready, she'll stop on her own." and all the mothers my own age tell me things like, "I sucked my thumb until I was 9, and it took years to fully kick the habit" and "My college roommate still sucks her thumb.", or "I got held back in Kindergarten because I couldn't write and suck my thumb in class at the same time."
Quincy rarely sucks her thumb unless she is going to sleep or watching tv, but still...that last one freaks me out, a little.

Thumbsucking.

Advice, suggestions, verbal abuse...

Let's hear 'em.

On Being a Responsible Pet Owner

Reese has been asking for a puppy a lot lately. She fell in love with HolleeAnn's Chiweenie pup, Coco, when we were in Ca and has been asking for a dog of her own ever since. I've tried reminding Reese that she really only liked Coco when she was "wrapped up like baby Jesus" and asleep in her lap. When Coco was awake, Reese was still a little afraid of her.

But now she has tied the sash from one of her dresses onto a Silly Band and secured it around the neck of a stuffed puppy. She's named her dog, Gracie, and takes her everywhere. She takes excellent care of Gracie and has made her a bed, and scavenged up toys and a water dish for her.

Then she pulled a fast one on us.
"How about if you guys watch how well I take care of my Gracie, and then you'll know I can take care of a real dog by Christmas?"
Now let's take a look at how two different parents (who were only halfway listening to the meaning of her question) respond from opposite ends of the house:

Meg's response: We see that you are taking very good care of Gracie. Someday, when all of the kids in our family are much older and we are ALL ready for a pet, we will talk about getting a dog. Until then, you can play with the dogs at your friends' houses and take care of Gracie.

Aaron's response: Yeah. Sounds good.

Reese: Thank you, Daddy! Hey Mooooooo-oooooom! Guess what.....

Thanks for destroying Plan A, Aaron.
I tried explaining the difference between a real pet and what a fine job she is doing at caring for Gracie, but she wouldn't hear it.

So today, I will launch Plan B
When Reese gets home, she will find that I had to put Gracie outside because she pooped on my carpet, then ate a pair of shoes that were left out.

Until she gets that Gracie under control, there will be no real dogs in our house.

I'm thinking Gracie is capable of doing all sorts of naughty things.

A Day in the Life

6:40 wake up to Corbin crying, realize we've overslept, run around house frantically trying to get Reese ready for school

6:47 take Corbin out of his crib so he'll stop screaming every time we pass his room and don't rescue him from baby jail. Put him on the floor in front of some toys

6:48 rush outside and get Reese on school bus, just in time. She is half awake, but she's dressed and has breakfast in her hands.

6:50 Carry shoeless Quincy back in the house and make breakfast

7:00 I smell something...

7:00:01 Follow the trail to one baby wearing a diaper that has exploded. Realize he must not have been changed into a fresh diaper before bed, and I didn't change him right when he woke up, so now the poo is creeping up the back of what used to be a white onesie.

7:01 pick up gross baby. Check carpet for signs of damage. Dry heave. Attempt to change diaper. Dry heave. Give up on the diaper change idea and put fully clothed baby into bathtub.

7:05 Hose baby off. Remove wet (ruined) clothing. Watch in horror as a dollop of poo slides out of clothing and into bath water.

7:05:01 Freak out.

7:05:02 Baby fills plastic cup with bathwater and drinks it.

7:05:03 Look to the sky and say, "Seriously?!"

7:06 Empty tub. clean tub. Clean baby again. Think about calling Mom.

7:10 throw away baby's clothes. Throw away my clothes.

7:15 step on a few of these
in the hallway, and think, "hmmm..."

7:16 Follow trail to master bathroom, to find that the remainder of the box has been poured into the toilet, where they expanded and solidified the contents of the toilet bowl.

7:17 "is that.....?" Yes. Yes it is. Toilet had been used, and there's a dookie suspended in the bowl like a pineapple ring in a jello-mold.

7:17:01 flush toilet. Immediately regret decision.

7:18 unclog toilet, clean toilet. Cry. Laugh. Curse whoever didn't flush.

7:25 toilet is clean, but water level still won't return to normal. Put the lid down and just walk away, grateful that there are two toilets in the house.

8:30 Q gets dropped off at school

9:00-10:30 P90X and Hip Hop Abs with Darcie. Laugh at how weak I am, sample Pumpkin flavored Hersheys (what the awesome?!), discover that Corbin has pooped AGAIN, diaper breaks and he crawls away while I'm changing him, but secretly, I am glad because the workout gets paused and I need a breather or I'll never survive the "Superman/Banana" segment.

10:30 come home to a driveway blocked by several tractors, backhoes, caterpillars, and other large monstrous trucks scattered across my driveway and lawn.

10:35 guys move trucks, I pull into the driveway, and then get blocked back in!

10:40 "uggg, sorry guys, but I'm leaving again in like half an hour".
guys: "we'll move when you come back out"
me: I think you should move 10 minutes before I come back out, so I don't have to wait for you.
guys: no problem. Sorry about the hole in your lawn.

what?
10:41 discover 4 x 4 x 6 ft HOLE in the lawn, and mountain of dirt next to it, then notice that the whole front of my yard is under 6 inches of water. (they are burying cables).

10:42 try not to be irritated. Buried cable = less snapped power lines in an ice storm.
And it's not like I have a super nice front yard.
But, but...it's still MY yard, and there are crepe myrtle branches broken off and there are people smoking in my yard, and there are trucks everywhere and really...it's a big giant muddy mess
I give up on any hope of still throwing together a garage sale by tomorrow. Besides, where would they park? You can't even get down my street, and everything is covered in mud.

11:00 shower, think about how pissed creepy keith is going to be when they tear up HIS yard. bwahahahaha

11:10 get out of shower, get dressed, and THEN realize that I still have NO BLINDS in my front window. I took the old one's down when I painted my bedroom a few weeks ago, and I haven't installed a new set. Normally, this doesn't matter, because the window is neck high, but today...well today there are a few guys on trucks on my lawn like 15 feet away.
Yeah. Them. They probably saw me naked.

11:30 pick up Quincy

12:00 Q naps, Corbin just cries in his bed for a really long time. I go in there and pick him up for a snuggle.
wait...he is still clothed, but where is his diaper? His onesie is still snapped closed, how the heck did he get the diaper off?
I finally find it shoved between the crib and the wall. Good thing I used a high quality, scrub-worthy paint on Corbin's room.
Laugh, cry, call my mom.

1:00-3:00
With both Corbin and Quincy asleep I sit down and get my paper on Kingship in Ancient Israel written. It's a beast, and I haven't spent this much time with my nose in the Old Testament in awhile. In the end I feel like I have a very well written paper. This is the assignment that was due the week I missed class, so I am excited to finally hand it in tonight and be totally caught up.

3:15 Reese comes home, Quincy and Corbin wake up

4:00
5:00 Dinner: last minute cilantro lime rice, black beans, and salad that turns out SO YUMMY.
5:15 Kids refuse to eat the rice because there are "leaves and yucky stuff in it".
I cave and feed them corn dogs.

6:15-8:45 World Civ. Which I am looking forward to because
a) there is no poop there
2) tonight was "meet the pres of NWACC night and Dr. T is bringing pizza to class.
d) I've texted a couple of night owl gal pals to see if anyone wants to meet up for a late movie after class.

I excitedly hand in my essay.
Unexcitedly listen as Dr. T returns everyone else's marked up essays accompanied by a "most of you failed this essay, but there were a few C's" discussion.

Uh oh.

He goes on to state that if we have failed, he has failed, and that's a problem. This week's assignment is to re-write the kingship essay according to his edits and critiques.
I can't very well do that without him grading it first. But knowing that this essay isn't exactly my best work, (I did throw it together in two hours) I just ask for it back. He says he'd love to grade it first, and will email it back to me, so I can more successfully do this week's rewrite.

So now I am waiting on that, which is no fun, because who likes to wait around for criticism? I know I should expect it, because it is an assignment and all, but I realized tonight from the looks on my classmate's faces, and reading a few of the comments left on their papers, that I was sorely mistaken when I assumed that this course would be an "easy A".

The lecture was about Confucianism, Daoism, and how bad energy attracts more bad energy.
Uh, looking at my day, I'm thinking that's pretty accurate.

My night owl gals were both unavailable for a movie,.
I head over to my friend, Katie's and hold her sweet 3 day old baby for a little while.
She is totally perfect, and how an any day that ends with holding a newborn turn out to be that bad?

I head home determined to channel up some of that elusive positive energy.

I came home to a sleeping family, and an entire pan of goodies in my kitchen. Like, a whole pan. Brownies, candy bars, pound cake, etc. (good thing I did two workouts today!) and a nice little note from my friend. Little things can make such a big difference.

Today:
The girls woke up at 4:30am because one of them needed to go potty, then Quincy went crazy and wouldn't let anyone go back to sleep. I told them if they stayed in their bedroom until 5am, they could have brownies for breakfast. They thought was Christmas.
Corbin has emptied the trash once, and knocked a full glass of water off the counter. But he's taken his diaper of and covered himself and his crib in poop only once, today.

Of course, it's only 10am...
but those are just little things, and I'm thinking positively.

Never Say Never

I swore many many years ago, that I would never put my child on a school bus.
Then my child started school.
I lasted 3 days.

The transition into Kindergarten has not been an easy one.
Basically, she doesn't like it.
But she does like it.

Change is a difficult thing for Reese. She likes to know what is happening. She likes to feel in control of her environment. She can handle huge challenges as long as she feels like she knows what is coming, and she feels in control of the situation.

Needless to say, with the little flood disaster, it's been a little chaotic around here the past few weeks.
At one point, there was plastic sheeting all over the living room, a mattress on the floor in the hallway, a sofa, loveseat, ottoman, 2 arm chairs, a dresser, a wardrobe, a rocking chair, a book shelf, a twin bed, a treadmill, a crib, and a piano all stacked in our dining room.

The girls were moved into our bedroom during the construction/painting phase, to the living room one night, and then to a new bedroom after the carpet arrived. Corbin was shuffled around as well and even spent a few nights in a pack n play in the kids' bathroom. "Dinner" meant anything that could be microwaved and served with salsa or ketchup.

Being a mom is not easy. It is hard to watch your child struggle with anything.

We forget how frustrating it was to learn how to tie shoelaces or how worried we used to get over a forgotten lunch, and we lose patience with our kids when they just can't relax or let "little" things go.

Brian Regan does a great comedy bit about this. We tell a kid that is crying over a popped balloon to "toughen up and forget about it---it's just a balloon we'll get you another balloon" and then we can't understand when they whine, "but I want THAT balloon, MY balloon!" and we grow even more impatient when they reject the replacement balloon that you had to fight a 15 minute line to get for them. Brian compares this to an adult losing a wallet or purse. Your keys are in there. Cash. Credit Cards. Your day planner, your ipod, your identity! If someone told you to "quit whining and forget about it, it's just a wallet, you'll get a new wallet", you'd be pretty pissed and feel like shouting back, "But that was MY wallet, I want that one, with my stuff in it! No! I don't want that ugly new wallet, I want the one with my drivers license and 100 bucks in it!"

Reese managed as well as any child could with her whole universe being flipped upside down around her, but when she got another double ear infection last week, it was the straw that broke the camels back. Her balloon popped and she fell apart.

Enter the 20 minute-peel-the-child-off-off-my-leg-and-leave-her-there-crying drop-offs at school. It had only been 3 days, and I was already burned out on meltdowns in the hallway outside her classroom door. Don't think I'm a sissy. These are not your ordinary meltdowns. They came complete with the ugly cry (you know, the one where the snot flows freely down to the chin, and it sounds so horrible you want to give them whatever they want just to make it stop?), threats to pee her pants if I didn't stay there with her, a heavy dose of, "How could you do this to me? You told me kindergarten would be fun! You lied!" that cut me right to the core. and of course, a desperate finger-pointing, public accusation of betrayal as I walked away.
I was shocked at her reaction to Kindergarten, but I really shouldn't have expected anything less. Reese is a theatrical negotiating genius and has been preparing all her life for this moment. She spared no dramatic expense.

Change is hard.
But life is full of change, so at some point, we all have to learn how to deal with it.

I had done everything I could considering our less-than-ideal torn up house situation, to make Reese's transition to full time Kindergarten a comfortable one. There was really nothing else to do but let her experience a little social discomfort, and offer her advice on how to work through it.

I put my kid on the bus.
I prayed.
and guess what?

We'll be okay.

Status Update

is it bad that no one in my house got dressed today?

Sunday Best

Why is it, that EVERY time I tell my girls it is bath time, they respond,
"Is it Sunday?"

Um. What the heck?!

My Lipgloss Be Poppin' 2

Reasons to stay off the phone/computer until my kids are asleep.