"I Will Not Tolerate Infestation!"

Frank Costanza was right about that. Pests are gross. creepy. disgusting. EVERYWHERE!!!
My home is under attack...well WAS under attack, anyway.
First of all. WHAT IS WITH THE SUPER-SIZED BUGS HERE?! I see a new, unidentified species every day!!!
THIS IS NOT FOLIAGE. It's a bug. It's 2 inches long, has creepy long antennae, flies and is called a Katydid. It's on my front door....and about every other surface outside my house.

In other news...
I've spent the past several months building up our food storage supply, and last month we FINALLY have updated 72 hour kits in backpacks, a 1 year supply of basics (grains, legumes, salt, oil, sugar, etc.) to keep us alive, and a rotating 3 month supply of everyday foods we eat.
I also recently purchased a rotating shelf unit to store all of our canned goods. It's waiting in my garage to be assembled. It takes 2 people to put together, and Aaron and I don't play nice when it comes to handy-projects and reading instructions, so we've been putting it off for a few weeks. We'll take a stab at it when the remodel is complete, since we can only handle one divorce at a time. But isn't it awesome? It holds up to 600 cans! YAY!

The only thing left on our immediate needs list is water, which I'm working on getting one of those 55 gallon barrels for that. I was feeling all awesome about my progress and even working on a post about self reliance and how good it feels to be prepared, and then disaster struck!!!

My cereal cabinet was attacked by pantry moths!

For those not familiar with these little buggers, the larvae have actually been known to eat through cardboard and even Tupperware to get to the goodness on your shelves. The adult looks like this:
Ew. Right? They're soooo gross! AND They lay eggs and reproduce at a ridiculous pace, but I didn't know that, so I threw out every unopened container and thought they were gone. But they came back!!! The 2nd time I was extra disgusted and threw EVERYTHING out in the whole cabinet, and everything but canned goods (which I washed off) in the neighboring cabinets. Gave my entire kitchen a bleach bath and waited....

They haven't returned to my kitchen since, but I wasn't super freaked out about the kitchen, I don't have a TON of food about in there. But I was terrified that they would work their way down the hall to Quincy's closet, which is stocked with ELEVEN 55 pound plastic buckets of wheat, rice, beans, corn, and oats, and THIS:
There are 2 shelves not shown because the unit was too tall, but you get the idea. Aside from the ones with the yellow labels (which I purchased online) I canned those bad boys myself. I canned the tomatoes from our garden too...(another post, check the archives. It involves a broken stove and a LOT of tears) Obviously, the cans are safe from pests, but what about all the pasta, rice, popcorn, oatmeal, crackers, potato flakes, bisquit mix, muffin mix, and cereal? What about the 55lb buckets? If they can eat through plastic, why not those? What about mylar bags? Are those safe? No one seems to know...

A few months ago, I wanted to put EVERYTHING into mylar bags and cans at a canning day with some other ladies, but was told "Noooooo", and how it's such "an unnecessary waste" to do such a thing. I listened and put everything right on my shelf and now cringe at the thought of losing months of spending an extra $10-$20 a week to build up my supply.

I checked this closet DAILY for signs of any super-pest that might have left the circus in my kitchen and wandered down the hall for the real schmorgasboard.

The day came this week. I turned on the light in Q's room and saw the all-too-familiar flutter of wings out of the corner of my eye. I thrust back the closet doors and shrieked.

Overnight, a little crop of pantry moths had hatched and they were having themselves a little family reunion in my food storage!!! How did they make it all the way down the hall?

The culprit? A 10 lb bag of rice that I had purchased during the "rice shortage" at the beginning of the summer. It had been in the cereal cabinet, but a few days before the "outbreak" I decided that since I wouldn't need it for awhile, I'd move it to Quincy's room to make space for things I use every day. Oops.

We spent the evening examining EVERYTHING in Q's closet and couldn't find the moths on anything once the bag of rice was gone, but I wasn't confident that there wasn't a nest hiding from me. Since everything really did look untouched I put as much as I could into my kitchen freezer. Now I'm just waiting for the outbreak.

This isn't exactly the answer I was looking for when I recently prayed to understand the Old Testament better. I was hoping to be able to relate on a more spiritual level. But after a week of pests, plagues, and even a drought in one bathroom, I suppose this is as close as I'm going to get.
Hmmm, now that I think about it, I was struck with snakes in my garage earlier this summer. Perhaps I should learn something from the experience before we have earthquakes and boils.

One thing I HAVE decided from this disaster is not to give up. Even though I will probably have to throw out most of my 3 month supply (since it's in cardboard boxes and will probably look a lot like the set for A Bugs Life II in a few days) I just refuse to give up on the food storage concept after all the time I've spent coming up with a system that works. Plus, it's a commandment, right? The blessings have got to be hidden SOME where. If we hadn't had food storage when Aaron lost his job a few years ago, we would have been in some deep poop. I KNOW there is a reason why we've been asked to do it.

My new plan is to store everything in cans and mylar bags. Now that I have a rotating shelf that will be much easier to do. PLUS, I just picked up these little guys:


They're the gravity shelves your soup comes in at the grocery store (4 shown here) and each can hold over a case of cans and has 2 rows so you can have 2 different items in each slot. I have 8 and they are soon to be filled with all my cream of's, chicken noodle, enchilada sauce...anything that comes in a 10 oz can. Nice huh? AND FREE! The grocery store was THROWING THEM AWAY. I'm going to make new labels for mine that match what I will put in it. Free food storage rotation.

Call your local grocery store and Get on it!
I know my Pantry Moths can't wait to.

A Moment of Self Reflection

This morning I went to the DMV. The DMV is pretty much the closest thing to hell on earth that I can think of... so yesterday, I spent 2 hours trying to register my vehicles over the phone in an attempt to avoid the yearly trip that takes me at least a week to emotionally prepare for.

Long story short, because of bad luck and a computer misprint, I still had to go in, to get a copy of my personal property assessment (yes, we pay personal property taxes on our cars here...it sucks and it is very expensive.) to prove that I had paid my personal property taxes in 2006. (Apparently, my bill statement, and a copy of my cleared check dated TWO YEARS AGO were not enough...sometimes I wonder why I go to such great measures with my bookkeeping, when it doesn't seem to matter in the end...but then I loose sleep at night over a misplaced receipt that I need to hand in for reimbursement, and fall back on my faithful "system" like a fat guy hitting a krispy kreme)

ANYWAY. I dropped R off at preschool and took deep breaths the whole way to the DMV, practicing for the moment I would attempt to hold my breath for the 45 minute line I was destined to stand in. Quincy happily smeared the jam from a cereal bar all over her face and sang "twinkle twinkle" in the backseat. I realized I'd forgotten a stroller and would have to hold her to keep her from running around and touching everything, or eating someones gum off the floor.

Well, after I waited in 3, went back and forth between the DMV and the County Assessors Office, and then got back into the car to go get cash from the bank (what's with state offices not having Debit machines? So annoying) I got everything I needed to register the cars and stepped into, what was hopefully, my last line for the year. By now, I had pretty much given up on holding Q anymore, because her jam hands were now sprinkled with a layer of goldfish cracker crumbs and she kept smearing her "sticky" all over the precious documents I'd been waiting in lines all morning to pick up.

tick. tick. tick. tick......why oh WHY is this line taking so long?!!! I gotta get me OUT of here! I take a moment to look around for the first time really. Since I'd been there I'd been so distracted by the paperwork issue that I'd actually forgotten about how much I despise the atmosphere, and until now, had been focusing all of my bad energy on the horned people behind the counter.

Something had changed at the DMV.

I hadn't stepped in gum. I hadn't slipped in a mysterious yellow liquid. Where was the stinky meth addict that usually stands behind me in line? Where is the sweaty lady with the disney character mini-backpack and shirt with cats on it? Why is everyone speaking English? Where are all the unattended children that with the lice crawling on their heads? Where is the beat up pregnant girl that goes outside every 5 minutes for a smoke? Where's the tatted up girl wearing overalls with a pink bra for a shirt?

WHERE AM I?

"well hello there."
While my thoughts wandered, Q had also wandered...over to a woman trying to read her book. She smiled at Quincy and in return, Quincy waved a jam-hand at her. SIGH. tap. tap. TAP. TAP. TAP. it's coming from the stiletto heeled lady 2 people in front of me. She checks her i phone for the 100th time and puts it back in her Coach bag. Cute bag...it somehow stands out like a sore thumb at the DMV.

OR DOES IT? Guy behind me is in a Polo dress shirt, holding a very nice leather briefcase. Another business man sits in the corner working on his laptop. Yuppie couple in front of me are reading the paper together. Lady playing peek-a-boo with Quincy is dressed up as well and has a 2nd book laying open on the chair next to her to protect her fancy purse from getting DMV all over it. Guy at the next window over is wearing a TUX.

What is going on around here? Where am I? I moved forward in line. "THAT IS OUTRAGEOUS!" it's I Phone in the coach bag lady "I hardly even DROVE the Hummer last year, with gas prices being so high.What about the Porshe?"

Hummer? Porshe? Well I suppose glamorous have to register their cars too...I just never run into them at the DMV, and always figured there was some sort of express lane for the rich and famous. I choke on the laughter I'm trying to hold back from my random thoughts.
SHE heard me!
I get the stink eye, and then sloooowly her eyes move across the dirty floor to my even dirtier daughter, who's poopy is starting to droop through the crotch of her pajamas. She shakes off the disgust and turns back to the counter. With my jaw dropped, I quickly glance around and reevaluate (judge) everyone in the DMV. I honestly am the ONLY sloppy ponytail in there. Did my environment move up a class and leave me behind?
My kid was the crusty kid running around in the DMV. MY KID was the bad smell from an unidentified source.

Flashback to that moment when, at a loss to find ANYthing else...Did I really use Quin's shirt to wipe a string of snot from her upper lip? YES. Gasp!
I'm ONE OF ...THEM.
Looking at the demographics of the people in the DMV today, I am officially THAT girl that everyone ELSE was judging, and probably sneaking a picture of with the camera on their phone (i phone, most likely) so THEY could poke fun at ME on THEIR blogs! Today was a day of self understanding. A wake-up call.
I got dressed in real clothes when I got home, and cut off Quincy's mullet.

Is This a Joke?

My Reese started preschool today. It was a great day for both of us. After I dropped her off, I headed to Lowes to pick up the rest of the supplies for the remodel. The first big difference was that I didn't have to get the enormous race car shopping cart. I popped Quincy into the regular buggy seat, gave her her "key-key" (blankie) and headed into the store. I discovered a 20% off coupon in my wallet that was nearing expiration and decided to get EVERY thing I needed (down to baseboards and white light switches.

As I wandered around the store I realized how QUIET it was. I checked my phone and I had picked out everything on my list in 15 minutes! Record time! I headed to the checkout and the cashier said, "Awww, what a little angel" I looked around...no one EVER uses those words when referring to MY children!

I couldn't believe my eyes.
Little Q had fallen asleep right there sitting up in the shopping cart!

Seriously. Shopping with one kid is a joke compared to shopping with two kids. Actually, my whole morning was like a joke. When I got home, I put her down for a nap and found myself with nothing to do! No diapers to change, no books to read, no breathing treatments to give, no sticky hands to wash or bums to wipe. No little feet to tickle or tummies to zerbet. I felt GUILTY for having no kids to tend. Which is ironic because I have a nice 2-3 hr break like this every single day during afternoon naptime, but this was different because it was MORNING. Quincy still naps twice a day, but I usually still have Reese to keep me company. Even if she's off doing her own thing, I'm still responsible for her.
Is this really happening? I would still have those 2-3 hours of quiet in the afternoon, after lunch. I was fully prepared to waste ALL of that time on myself, as I usually do. But I can't do that twice in one day, can I? It seems so...lazy!

So, I unloaded the supplies from the van, did 2 loads of laundry (I even line dried everything outside on the clothesline), cleaned the kitchen, took a shower, straightened my hair and read for a little while. I had forgotten how much free time I had when it was just me and little Reese. I think I wasted most of it sleeping, eating mac n cheese, and trying not to throw up because I was pregnant. How did I miss such a sweet stage of her life? The 2 nap stage! The fall asleep in the shopping cart stage! What was I thinking?! ONE kid is so easy!
It's times like this when I think I could handle 3 kids. Actually, I KNOW i could handle 3 kids...it's the 9 months of throwing up and partial bed rest before #3 would arrive that I can't handle yet.

We picked Reese up and it was if she hadn't seen us in ages. She was so...Lovely is the only word that seems to fit. Everything she said was sticky sweet and sugar coated: "I love you mommy. I missed you Quincy, you're my best friend and you can come to preschool when you grow bigger and eat your oatmeal. How was your day mommy? Thank you for taking me to preschool mommy. I'll help Quincy with her shoes because I love her so much. May I please have some lunch when we get to our house?" I LOVE those sugar lips!

This was a very nice change from the past 2 weeks....we've had some, er "behavior" issues with her, and it seems like everything has been a fight. Even Quincy was waking up all night long. Just when I was ready to throw in the towel I took them to the pediatrician monday and behold: BOTH girls had ear infections! The doc says they were BLAZIN' red and have probably been infected for over a week, if not longer. She gave them both drops and antibiotics and, since we haven't had any fevers or a runny nose with Reese, she said it's ok to go ahead and go to preschool. Didn't have to tell me twice, I happily dropped her off this morning, and she was happy to go.

Ahh the miracle of amoxicillin.
My house is clean and my kids are happy...what a great day!

Bathroom update, Joe Plumber was a no show today! He called 2 hrs AFTER he was supposed to be here and rescheduled the job for tomorrow morning. I was semi-irritated. Only semi because he was supposed to be here during nap time, and since he wasn't showing up I took a nice 2 hour nap instead. Again, what a great day!

In Honor of Dorothy's Tub, the Font Color is Poop Brown.

What is wrong with me? Why can't I use a camera? In the last year we've been through 4 (yes, FOUR) digital cameras. I took like 30 pics of the bathroom before I tore it up, and none of them will download from the camera. You will have to settle for what I could find of "before" and the few of the "during" that did work.

Dinner was spaghetti, obviously.

what's so scary about that?
the wall directly behind me is the one I'm building up to be a full wall.

I call this part of a project "the ugly stage" (no need for an explanation...you all saw the photo of me posted above) It's the point of no return where you really just have to finish what you've started, yet it's SO ugly, you can't imagine it ever looking like that picture from Better Homes and Gardens that inspired you to pull out the sledgehammer in the first place. The scraped ceiling. I had some great pics of the floor buried in 2 inches of white dust, but they didn't turn out. The wires hanging from the ceiling are where the radiant heat unit used to be. I need to cap off the line and feed it up through attic. I'll wait until it's less than 5,000 degrees up there to do that.

Removing tile sucks. I am totally impressed with myself for salvaging the walls behind it though. Now I can hang the backer board directly on top and get to tiling.

Again, I give you "the ugly stage"... The wall with all the junk removed and plumbing exposed. I have another plumber coming today to give me a bid. Oh, this picture has a teeny bit of the awesome vinyl floor in it. That is going to go...along with the carpet in front of the vanity. Tile, tile, and more tile! And how 'bout that nasty tub? I can't believe I put my babies in there. If you look close you might see a few drops of blood from my big toe where I sliced it open on a piece of chipped tile. My advice...Don't work in flip flops...it is stupid.

I can't wait to get this over with! It is going to be so nice! I'd really love to take a break from home projects for a little while, but now that the subfloor under the tub is exposed....the smell of moist insulation is begging me to put a wiggle in it and get that wall closed back up!

S-A-T-U-R-D-A-Y NIGHT!

Well, I finished Breaking Dawn on Saturday ("Eh." is really the only opinion I can give at this point). Aaron and the kids were nappin' and I found myself with some free time on my hands. The thought entered my mind that there's really no better time than now to get started on bathroom remodel #2.

Sometimes I forget how quickly demolition goes in comparison to installation. Aaron made regular visits to offer muscular assistance, and offer me beverages. What a guy. He kept kids entertained when they woke up. Gave Q a breathing treatment, dinner and put her to bed without interrupting the demolition chaos. After awhile I really think was just scared to open the bathroom door anymore. I don't blame him. I was like a mad woman in there...

The crowbar was a pryin'
The hammer was a poundin'
The trowel was a scrapin'
and I was a singin'

In just a few hours, I scraped the popcorn ceiling, unwired and removed the nasty 1970's radiant heat unit, I chiseled out all the original "gold freckled" tile, went through 2 killers albums, and tore down the drywall to expose the plumbing. AND cleaned up all the mess... Which consequently means that today....

My back is a achin'
My knuckles are a bleedin'
My shoulders are a hurtin'
Old Lady who haunts my house is a cryin'
but I am a SMILIN'!!!!

I am just SO excited to have this project under way. Tomorrow I plan to make a few cuts, frame in the new shower wall (yes, SHOWER...won't that be nice so my guests don't have to bathe like 3 year olds?) get one more plumbing bid, pick out new hardware, hang tar paper and screw on the cement board. As soon as Joe Plumber gets my shower plumbed in, I can start Tile-Mania II. Shelly are you still my VT? How do you feel about free manual labor?

I tried to find an online image to provide some visual interest to this post. Unfortunately, my Google search for a hot pink crowbar was unsuccessful....unless you are seeking VERY filthy literature. What a sick world we live in.

A special thanks to Kasey for lending me tools (Rambo nail gun) and for taking Reese home for a sleepover at her house. As always you went above and beyond the calling of a friend and should wear the "super-hero" title with pride.

Pictures and witty commentary to come...

Come On, Vamanos, Everybody Let's Go!

This morning I took Reese with me to some garage sales near our house, in search of a jogging stroller. I'd found 2 sales via Craig's List that supposedly had them for a reasonable price, so I figured we'd go check them out. On our way, we stumbled across this little beauty:
In perfect condition, complete with a Disney Princess Helmet!
Retail value on Walmart.com:
for the bike $48.42
for the helmet $20.48

Grand total at the garage sale: $10!
Reese was so excited that she had tears in her eyes! I have NEVER seen my child this happy before. (well except for the time Emily brought her the Barbie castle...I think she had a heart attack that day)
We gathered up our loot and waited in line at the front of the garage to pay. Well tears of joy turned to tears of sadness when the lady in front of us in line turned around and said, "I just paid for that bike. We're taking it home."

Reese walked back to the van with her head hung low. I'm still not sure who was more disappointed....her for not getting the bike, or me for missing out on a $60 save.

Luckily, her spirits were brightened by an Island Princess Barbie (the one with the freaky peacock dress, and glittered lips) which we purchased for 25 cents at the next stop.

So, the search for the perfect bike for Reese continues...I have no problem putting out the money for a helmet, but I just hate to pay $50 for a bike, when I know we'll have to buy a second one for Q in a year. (who will probably learn how to use pedals before Reese -who up until now, would have preferred a chariot)

Oh and both jogging strollers were sold before I got there! Some days are luckier than others, I suppose. I am starting to think that the money for a jogging stroller might be better spent on a treadmill so I can run whenever I want.

Speaking of running...just signed up for a 5K. By noon on labor day I should be able to cross off the last item on my new years resolution list. yay!

Last But Not Least...

Part III of the big vaycay was Jana and Scott's wedding. We are so happy for these guys! Scott, you and Jana are perfect for each other and we can see that you'll fit right in with the rest of the Willy Clan. Congratulations!

Our girls, along with Jana's 6 other nieces, were flower girls. I found their dresses for $3 at the Associate's Store! They've been asking to wear them all summer, but I just knew that if I gave in and said, "yes"...well THAT would be the Sunday they would be given chocolate in Sunbeams and finger paint in the Nursery.
Or, Reese would do something like this....

It was pretty hot outside and Reese got tired of waiting for everyone to finish taking pictures, so she sought out alternate means of entertainment and cooling off.
Her dress was so wet that we could wring it out and make a puddle on the ground when she was done. I couldn't blame her... I was so hot and tired by the end of the day that I would have done the same thing were it socially appropriate.
I think Q must have eaten 20 flowers that day...hopefully none of them were toxic. Apparently, plant destruction is a new fad because she pulled at least 60 flower heads off the bucket of daisies in my entryway yesterday!

Sugar and Spice and Everything...Nice?

The Obsession began long ago... ...and this summer, all her wildest dreams came true. My little Cinderellas! Thank you grandma Lynda for the DARLING Cinderella dresses! Can you believe Aaron's mom MADE Quincy's dress! Quincy spent most of her time, while waiting in lines, picking the little stars off the tulle on her dress. Cute AND functional! Lynda and Jenny were total lifesavers...I had searched EVERYWHERE for princess dresses small enough for Quincy and had been very unsuccessful. Lucky for me, neither Lynda or Jenny need sleep and they both sacrificed so little Q could go to Disneyland in style. I can't believe I don't have a picture on MY camera of Lynda with the girls. I'll be sure to post them when I get them from my mom. Which means lucky you...more vacation posts.

Can you see the pure joy on my face? These are the famous Disneyland pickle and pineapple boat. You eat them simultaneously. Sounds gross? Think again. It can only be described as a party in your mouth. Take the challenge and try it next time you're at Disneyland!
Ok MY Disney pictures are pretty lousy (how 'bout that rollercoaster hair?) Of the MANY pictures I took at Disneyland, most were on my mom's camera, but here are the few that I took with mine. Mom if you're reading this, bring your memory card so i can burn all the pics to a cd. I'll post more pics when I get them. Reese and Quincy were lucky enough to have BOTH of their Grandmas, and Grandpa Hal with them for the first day in Disneyland. What more does a parent need? It was ideal, Aaron and I managed to sneak away a few times with Janae and Steve to ride Indiana Jones, Space Mountain and Great Thunder Mountain Railroad...which was my very first rollercoaster. I was totally traumatized because I still remember 18 years later being absolutely terrified and crying hysterically when I got off the ride. Well 18 years later my dad is looking a little, well old (no offense Dad-O) and it was payback time. I think he needed to take extra heart medication after the ride. I KNOW he needed a Diet Pepsi and an ice cream sundae to help recover. I only wish I had taken a photo of his hair when the ride stopped to capture the beauty, it was classic-especially when paired with his color-drained expression. Day 1 we took Cinderella's to Disneyland, Day 2 it was Belle. R is for Reese! She was very proud of herself for coming up with this "pose". (hmm...do you think she saw the kids in the picture right before us sitting the exact same way?) Snow White also made her way to Disneyland. And another little shout out to Jenny for the amazing extreme makeover you did on Reese's ratty old snow white dress. She shortened the sleeves, hemmed it, took in the waist and shoulders just so my Q could match her sister at Disneyland. Really it's amazing what she did. Here is a picute of what the dress used to look like (wow look at no-hair reese!) All hail the Queen. Thank you Jenny! You are SO talented and my little princesses were in heaven with their dresses. Reese was actually very happy to meet the princesses. I'm not really sure what her melancholy expression is about in all the pictures I took. Hopefully I got some better one's on my mom's camera. I loved when she told snow white, "You're my best friend. I'll never forget you." So sweet! If only we'd made it over to meet Cinderella and Belle when they were dressed in those costumes. The stuff little girls are made of.... These pics of Reese, Quin and their cousin Madeline were taken in Balboa at the cutest little store that hosts little girls tea parties. The girls loved dressing up in their tea party hats. If only I could get them to use their tea party manners we'd be set.

Ok I have more pictures to share, but I am totally late for lunch at Carrie's and I promised I'd at least attempt to be there on time! more to come...

Open. Open. Open. Open.

Every year our local scrapbooking store hosts a 2 day crop called Scrap Pink. It is a fabulous event full of fun, games, door prizes, catered meals, all the Dr. Pepper a girl could need at 1:30am, lots of laughing and silliness and, of course, 2 days full of scrapbooking-uninterrupted by poopy diapers, dishes, laundry, bills, unmade beds, hungry husbands, ect-all the reasons that make scrapbooking at home a challenge. An added bonus for cropping at SSD is the unlimited access to all the tools, punches, diecuts, and shopping!
Why Scrap Pink? Part of the proceeds go to the Susan Komen Breast Cancer Foundation. It makes me feel less guilty for spending the weekend scrapbooking when I know it is also benefiting someone other than myself...

So to anyone who gives me flack on the subject...I reply, "hey man, I scrap to save lives."


http://aaronandmeg.blogspot.com/2007/10/race-for-cure.html

So last year my mom (and best friend in the whole world...and no, not because we are one of those YaYa sisterhood, I-heart-my-cat-t-shirt-wearing, mother-daughter couples, that hang out together only because they are too weird to make any other friends....but because she is awesome. and SO MUCH FUN! Seriously, Lauralei Gilmore has NOTHING on this lady in the cool mom dept.) happened to be in town during Scrap Pink. We were out of town (livin' it up at a fabulous B&B in Jamesport, Mo) on sign up day, and ended up in spots 18 and 19 on the waiting list. Long story short....we spent the week getting all geared up to go and calling every day to get and update on our status. By the day before the event we had moved all the way up to spots 2 and 3.

and that's where we stayed. Spots 2 and 3 on the outside of the store, peeking into the windows and watching everyone have more fun than us!

NEVER again!

THIS year I was ready with a plan of action...

9:00 pm the day before sign-up has open registration for Scrap Pink (they have pre-registration for the BIG BIG spenders which I am not): I call the store to see how many spots are available.

THERE ARE ONLY 2 SPOTS LEFT!!! YIKES! Those Diamond Divas had filled 38 out of 40 crop spots! What's a girl to do?!

7:30 am Registration Day: I put on my game face and give the girls a pep talk.
7:45 am I program the phone number to SSD into my cell phone so I can efficiently make consecutive calls while standing in line, starting 10 min before they open, just in case our clocks are not synchronized.
8:00 am we head out the door prepared to SIT OUTSIDE the door and wait until they open the store at 10.
8:15 am Get distracted by hunger and drive through to pick up a bribe for the ladies in the store...maybe they'll let me in early.

Wouldn't YOU open the door to a stranger an hour and a half early if they offered you one of these bad boys?

8:30 am Reese and Quincy have finished their donuts and are starting to get antsy...apparently this is not as much fun or as important for them as it is for me. Time for some reinforcements:

Care Bears to the Rescue!

8:55 am Signs of life inside the store! With the kids glued to the tube, I head over to the tinted window and push my nose against the glass. There are 2 lovely ladies staring back at me.
"You guys open at 10?" not sure if they can hear me through the closed doors...I hold up 10 fingers.

They laugh and nod yes.

"Okay....I'll be heeere!" I flash a thumbs-up sign, and then realize this is my moment to solidify my place in line...I turn back toward the glass.

"I'm #1...Me. ...okay?" I can't believe I am actually holding up 1 finger with one hand and pointing to myself with the other hand.

I could make out 2 smiles through the tinted glass, so I head back to the car feeling pretty secure.

9:00 am a 2nd car appears. I begin to panic. Deep breaths. Time to get the kids out of the car and park myself in front of that door.

9:01 am It's Jerushia! Yay, some company that actually appreciates the waiting game! I offer her a donut and ask her not to judge me for how many are already missing from the box. Either Jerushia has incredible will power or she thought I was trying to poison her, because she only took one.
This is my favorite part. Notice the advertisement at the bottom. ZERO trans fat...Right. Like that's going to make me feel any better about the 380 calories and 20 grams of fat per donut.

9:15 am Oh. Lucky us. It is starting to rain.

Helloooo? Anyone in there?

9:20 am The doors open. The ladies inside felt bad for my kids that were being forced to sit in the rain (while they eat Krispy Kremes and watch movies I remind you....sounds pretty fabulous if you ask me) and invited us inside to snatch up seats 39 and 40 for Scrap Pink!

Mission Accomplished!

I would like to give a little shout out to the greatest band ever, U2... to whom I feel the need to give their due credit for preparing me for the fight.
So here's to Bono, The Edge, Adam Clayton and Larry Mullen Jr....were it not for the countless hours I spent camped out in line to get tickets into your concerts, I would be on a waiting list right now.

Can't wait to see you in 5 weeks mom!

Chuck E Cheese vs. Gilroy Gardens

Went to Chuck E Cheese with the cousins (because we are suckers for torture) so we could let the kids run loose in the one place where the atmosphere is probably more obnoxious than they are when loaded up on candy, soda and pizza.

My Quincy is a genius. She parked herself in a teletubbies kidde-ride, strapped herself in and waited patiently. EVERY KID that walked past her, in that very crowded Chuck E Cheese, would drop a token in the ride as they passed. After about an hour, she had free loaded enough rides to rock herself to sleep in the ride!


Reese found the man of her dreams in the adjacent ride and spent most of her time telling him her hopes and dreams of their future together as Mr and Mrs Joe theMechanically Operated Plastic Dog Catcher.
She was quite the smitten kitten, and very embarrassed every time she realized I had caught a snippet of their very serious conversations of running away together.
I imagine Taylor is cautioning Quincy that she hasn't yet been vaccinated for all the diseases she might catch from licking the skee ball machine, and that she should stick to her usual diet of sucking on pens, pencils, keys, shoes and her unwashed thumb...just to be safe.

"I miss Joe..."

After the so-so pizza, about zillion tokens, a package of Fun Dip, the grimy buffet of germs and sticky, naughty, little kids (that seem to attach themselves to me...I'm like a magnet for evil spawn) that make up the total Chuck E Cheese experience, we decided we would spend the following day at Gilroy Gardens for a non-hepatitis/rotavirus infested day of fun.Brock and Reese riding "Dragon" and "Sparkles".

I think Reese sampled every horse on BOTH carousels, and named every one of them Sparkles.

Oh man. who let that kid behind the wheel? Don't Drink and Drive Tyler. :o)

Taylor and Reese driving the cars. Reese loved that she didn't have to sit in a car seat for these little cars.


Quincy thought the lazy river was a good time to take a nap.

I don't have any pictures of Quincy on this ride because I took them with my mom's camera. The ride operator told me she was big enough to go by herself, so I nervously strapped her in and sent her off. If I had done that to Reese, she would never speak to me again... but Quin appeared to be pretty indifferent. Until the ride was over and it was time to get out---when she started screaming, "AGAIN FISHY! AGAIN FISHY!" as she clung to her seatbelt with her Kung Fu Death Grip.
The meltdown had begun.
Meanwhile, Reese's personality disorder was kicking into high gear and she was mad at someone for who-knows-what and also screaming.

Time to go home!

We counted the seconds until the moment they would crash on the way home as we dragged my two very undelightful little girls back to the car. But the crash never came, and we were doomed to be serenaded with theme park hysterics the entire 40 minutes it would take us to get home.

Well, at least they had a great time while we were there!

Quincy about lost it when we had to stop for gas, and was crying so hard that her tiny body shook with each whimper. Out of desperation, my mom bought some chocolate yogurt covered pretzels....which are ironically called Flips, because her frown flipped upside-down and she forgot all her troubles as she sucked the chocolate off of each pretzel one at a time. Reese was pacified with a chocolate frosty from Wendy's...which went right through her and she threw it up all over my parents trampoline later. Lucky for me, Taylor and Jordan were babysitting!