"If You See Me Walking By With a Teardrop in My Eye, Look Away. Baby, Look Away..."

Ross and Marge have traded in their minivan for a PT Cruiser.
Marge has decided that even though she hasn't been behind the wheel in over 2 years, she would like to start driving again, since her "new car isn't so giant, and maybe it isn't as difficult as she remembers".

Marge. You are 90. The fact that you actually used the phrase "hopefully I can remember which pedals to use" only semi-jokingly scares the crap out of me. Do not start driving.

You are 90.
You have recently been diagnosed with Alzheimer's.
You are 90.
You have cataracts that blind you so badly that you require a shot in your left eye every two weeks and surgery every couple of years.
YOU ARE FREAKING 90.

Do NOT start driving. Please.

And while we're at it. The PT Cruiser. I'll admit that they're kind of a fun, funky little car. It's nice to see something different on the road once in awhile. But honestly, the manufacturing and selling of the PT Cruiser should basically be illegal.
Why?
People who generally purchase PT Cruisers should not be driving.

Don't do it Marge. Just because that license hasn't expired doesn't make it ok for you to get behind the wheel.

...and shame on your kids for not telling you this. Then again...you are 90, and I've seen the handicapped sticker in their window (where do you people score those? Do they come free in "Happy 70th Birthday" cards? Can I find a mail order for one on the back of the PolyGrip packaging? Is it the free prize at the bottom of the All Bran cereal box? How do I get into the club? I want front row parking!) and the purple hair on your daughter in law ...perhaps they shouldn't be driving either.