What's That You Say About Bad Karma???

In order to fully appreciate this post, you should probably read this and this.

On Thursday, Aaron came home and said, "hey, get a sitter for Saturday night. We're going out."
Where are we going?

Dancin' at SNOW'S BIG RED BARN with Carl and Barb!

Who are Carl and Barb? The 80-somethings that live across the street! They even had us come over Saturday morning, so they could "put on a record" and teach us how to Texas Two Step and Country Waltz in their living room.

Here they are giving a beautiful demonstration...


And here we are, desperately trying not to step on each other's toes, and failing miserably. If only I had thought to take a photo of Carl and Barb's expressions after witnessing our first attempt at dancing since our wedding reception almost 7 1/2 years ago.

Side story: (because when doesn't one of my posts include at least one of these?)

Please Note the awful state of my hair. It was taken PRE-shower. It is leftover from Friday night's YW Board Meeting adventures. I would blog the whole story (because there is OH SO MUCH MORE to be told), but won't, out of fear of actually offending people. But trust me, it would have been a way better post than this one. Let's just say that Friday night involved dinner at a friend's house, a 3 hour "conversion story" from unexpected visitor: 50 year old hippe-turned-Christian Singer/Songwriter, who found Jesus through Saturday morning cartoons, a torn ACL, and a LOT of heroin and LSD (which he quit cold turkey after his conversion 30 years ago), a 30 minute live concert from said performer (acoustic guitar and what else-a harmonica), some team-building-super-fun home-made cheers, a swim in a supposedly mink-infested (yes, mink...like the animal before it's a coat) lake at 1:30am , and a (swimsuits ON) communal bath (again, SWIMSUITS ON...the night was weird, but not THAT weird) with friends and aromatherapy.
All crazy, unexpected, bizzaro-world randomness aside, I had a great time. I came home at 3:30am from the longest board meeting of my life only to find that we had NO HOT WATER. No hot water=no shower=bad news bears for Mego. The Neighbor of the Year Award goes to Jenny for helpin' out a stinky girl in need and letting me use her shower to get the lake water/schwetty pits from social discomfort/ aromatherapy smell out of her hair. Thank You.

Friday night was my first sign that Mr. Bad Karma had found my address (probably from the naughty list...I'm pretty sure I'm on THAT this year) and was coming my way.

Carl and Barb were actually very patient with our lack of dancing skills and we finally started to catch on once we muted the football game in the background. For those who know us, that clue should be an indicator to source of our dancing issues.

We took separate cars to the Big Red Barn, because Carl and Barb ride with their best friends and dancin' buddies Tom and Virginia every week and we wanted to go "munch on some grindage" before the dance.

Sticking with our theme

Carl dressed Aaron in one of his western shirts and his favorite DENIM hat. I silently laughed at the thought that Aaron just had to be wearing denim, of all things. Barb told us some stories about their years on square dancing teams in Oklahoma. She said that Carl had a shirt and hat to match every one of her dresses. I then made the mistake of asking her what I should wear.

"Well Sweetie, you mean to tell me you don't own a denim dress? I'm sure you could find one to borrow from a friend. You HAVE to match your partner."

Shoot. A DENIM DRESS.

I shamefully admitted I had one in the back (WAY BACK) of my closet.
"then all you need are some boots, Baby, and you'll be all set" She cheered.

Behold, I give you BAD KARMA:

I doubt if this dress has even been worn since I left the denim homeland. I don't know how it managed to escape all those garage sales I've had! I think my favorite part is that even though it is STRETCHY DENIM, it has still been "distressed" and sandblasted to look worn out, where it should. (kind of like jeans that already look worn out in the knees and seat).

I want to know WHO at the Denim Dress Factory thought that the thighs and boobs of the dress would be the most "high traffic" area??! It also has a zipper down the front and the brand is a rhinestone tag that says "HOT KISS". I was down with J Lo when I bought this dress. enough said. Feeling rather self conscious, I picked up our babysitter and was donned in these FABULOUS Brighton Boots and hat by Jocelyn. She found them on a miracle sale for $27, but still, I will NEVER judge someone for paying $375 (the normal price) for boots. My feet were IN HEAVEN. Thank you Jocelyn!!! I didn't want to give them back.

I admit that I am shallow enough that I actually felt like a better person with these beautiful babies on my feet. Which is the opposite of how the denim dress made me feel. I was brought back to reality when I had to unZIP my ghetto fab dress to apply deodorant before we left.

I was reeeeally excited about my pork....and my feathered hair.

What's the score, Baby?

When we arrived, they were seated at their usual table by the band (which is reserved for them every week)
I wish I had a picture of Tom and Virginia-they were wonderful. Paired with our neighbors, they were some of the most pleasant people I've ever had a conversation with. Virginia looks and acts a lot like my MiMa, and Tom was wearing a HUGE white cowboy hat, a white suede jacket, dark slacks, a shiny western shirt and RED boots with flames on them. His teeth glowed in the dark and his eyes sparkled when he looked at you. He was like an old time movie star. Aaron immediately fell under Tom's magical spell and stared at him all night, deep in thought, muttering things to himself like, "well...maybe the boots...Hmmm...I just don't know if I could pull off the jacket"

I did my best to console him "---Oh you don't? Really Aaron? you don't say. Well, maybe when you're 90."

Carl, Barb, Snow's Big Red Barn Band, and Virginia on the far right
I was fully prepared to take pictures and make fun of everyone at Snows. Larry the Cable Guy was there...er, well, 3 of his long lost twin brother's were there, anyway. But apparently Mr. Bad Karma brought his two friends, Tact and Shame along with him and I suddenly respected our fellow dancing strangers too much to take their pictures. I'm not sayin' there wasn't anything blogworthy to see-because THERE WAS....Larry the Cable Guy, hello?! And member's of the band had names like Sonny and Dub. Seriously. Everyone knows everyone by name at this place. Carl and Barb have been dancing at Snow's just about every Saturday night for the past 14 years. I can't put down their people....tempted as I am. We were just having so much fun....and they gave us such a warm welcome. We will definitely go back again...and some friends with us, for sure! A little shout-out to my knight-in-shining-belt-buckle. Although I took several spins around the room with Carl and Tom my guy danced ALL night long. Barb and Virginia taught him a few sweet moves, and by the end of the night we felt like superstars....until we danced together again and realized the glory had ALL come from our seasoned partners. We actually almost fell over once.

They only did a handful of line dances, but I caught on to Elvira and Tush Push pretty quickly. (NOTICE: again, ZERO sandblasting on the tush-push of this denim ...no natural wear and tear either-which tells I got smart enough to finally check a mirror and bury it's belted, stretchy, goodness in the back of the closet)

I've been humbled by the denim.