Lynda: I'm right here, Robert. Across the room? Why do I need to respond to your email?
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Aaron: Now, just hear me out. Wal-Mart is THE greatest thing that ever happened.
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Lynda: John Wooden died?!
Lynda: Barbara Billingsley died?!
Lynda: Tom Bosley died! I knew about that one, but golly.
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Aaron: What ever happened to the days when the CIA just went out and killed people? For good, I mean. Just the bad crazy people.
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Lynda: Robert you have a lot of grey hair.
Robert: Ok, fine. I'm going to start using Just for Men. Would you like that, Lynda?
Lynda: No, really. It's like I just realized it. I looked up at you while you were telling that crazy story and I noticed. You are covered in grey hair. A whole head full!
Aaron: Dad, with all that grey, they say you should go blonde. It's easier to cover the grey with blonde.
Rob: Ok. first thing tomorrow morning, Aaron, we're going to Sams club. It's going to take a 6 pack of hair color to cover what I've got.
Aaron: It's politically correct for women to color their hair. Men should just go grey.
Rob: You think you're going grey?
Aaron: Oh I know I am. People at work tell me that all the time. They're like, 'Hey! You've got a lot of grey.' And I just look at them and I'm like, 'uh. yeah, buddy. I know. It's because of you.'
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Aaron: ...I mean, we've got Jason Bourne out there. What's he doing all this time, huh? Isn't Fidel Castro still on the loose? Get Bourne on that guy!
Lynda: Fidel Castro is like 89, leave him alone.
Meg: I like how Jason Bourne doesn't actually exist, yet we're debating over which dictator we should have fake-killed.
Aaron: Oh, he's out there.
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Aaron: Huh. Should I not be this grey? I'm only thirty-four. It's all this stress! I can't handle it! Pass me the remote.
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Meg: Quincy, you can walk. Don't make Grandpa carry you anymore.
Quincy: Are you too heavy, Grandpa?
Rob: Me? Yes. I'm too heavy.
