Foiled Again!

With everything that needs to be done, today, I figured I could use a little servant help around here.

So I did what any practical person would do: I bought a box of Twinkies.
I don't know where I went wrong.

I watered faithfully.
I waited patiently.

Buyer Beware:
they did NOT grow into minions!

Sigh. How very dissappointing.
And now, I am left with only the children, who actually do sound quite like minions when they giggle, to do my bidding.

I think I will pay them in Twinkies.

Bribery Works 101

There are many things that bring me a great deal of joy in life.
A candy machine is one of them.
I know. It's 25 cents for like, 20 candies, and for another 50 cents I could have an entire bag of candy from the vending machine on the other wall...but I like the thrill of turning the crank, and hearing the plinkety-plink of chocolate coming through a shoot and heading my way. It's a happy sound.
Plus it is amazing how well 2 over-tired little girls will behave, knowing there is the possibility of a candy machine at your last stop.

I had about 10000000 errands to run. They HAD to be done. Getting the oil changed at the Honda dealership was number 9999999 on the list.

My girls had never heard of a magical machine that pumps out candy when you put money in. Really. I made it almost 5 years as a mother. I'm quite proud of myself.
And so began the hype on errand numero uno:
Angels.
Stop #2...
polite little darlings!
And so it continued all morning long.
Wonderful.
I am embarrassed to admit that they selected Skittles over Reese's or peanut M&M's...but I'm glad that their little lives have such a little amount of stress in them that my girls don't automatically smell the chocolate calling to them, offering mental relief when they enter a building...like it does for me.
Anyway, candies for my little angels.
A quarter goes a long way.

If only they had a candy machine at the DMV, I might be better behaved.

...scratch that. I wouldn't touch the candy machine at the DMV.
I don't touch anything at the DMV.