Season's endings

Summer break will be over in 2 weeks. 

I feel both heartbroken and welcome to change at the same time. I was so sick for the end of the school year and for the first half of summer that I feel like I need to make up for all the time I was a not-fun mom. We need more time! I also really don't want to send Corbin to kindergarten. I just don't. 

The other (louder) half of me is still coming off of 10 day vacation preceded by 2 weeks of fun with grandma which were preceded by weeks and weeks where my only goals were to keep everyone alive and to keep enough fluids down to stay out of the hospital. Everything related to order and cleanliness around here have been neglected for way too long and it's starting to show it's ugly head in the form of meltdowns (myself included. I've cried 3 times in 4 days over things that just shouldn't matter). My kids love spontaneous fun (who doesn't?) but we all need routine, structure and order to stay sane.  I am feeling torn and highly tempted to devote every bit of energy I have to deep cleaning our house, weeding the backyard, gutting the garage, and restoring 100% tidiness and organization to our lives.  

I will openly admit that the mess is getting to me in an awful way. But in less than 2 weeks these kids will be ruled by quietness, routine, homework, schedules, andrules-about-everything at school and before we know it, we will all be aching for these lazy messy summer days.  I need to embrace the last few weeks of the season and finish out our full summer prescription or come Autumn we'll grow sick of routine much too quickly.  

 I'm slowly taking small bites from the disaster-sandwich that is our chaotic house and getting it to a place where it is at least functional and the children will be able to have a smooth transition back to school. My floors will wait two more weeks before I tackle the perma-sticky residue from the 200 Popsicles we have eaten.  

I don't want my kids to remember their last days of summer spent inside cleaning all day with a grouchy chore lord for a mom. Tempted as I am to go into binge cleaning and organizing sprees, I determined to let the season end first and keep chores limited to a short about of time each day, followed by something adventurous.  

It is still summer for these kids for two more weeks and they need a summer mom

and in summer, we play.