Confession:
For some reason, I find the use of a conductor's baton when leading the congregation in sacrament hymns at church totally demeaning. I can't even look up at the stand. It really really bothers me.
Is it just me? Probably.
I don't care to be directed musically with any kind of baton, but it's just that this particular baton is SO GINORMOUS. It seems so out of place in a chapel...more like a police baton is being waved around at me. I don't know if I should sing, or duck and cover...or shout Expelliarmus!
Cuz really, it's that huge. It's like a freaking Harry Potter wand. I am so totally distracted during the hymns lately, that we are going to have to find another place to sit during church, because rather than worshipping with lovely songs of praise, I find myself daydreaming about walking up to the stand between songs and breaking the baton. It's not like our congregation is so large that the people in the back can't see. People on Mars could see this thing. I know. I'm being totally ridiculous. I just need to find another place to sit, where we aren't so close that I have to worry about the conductor losing grip on the baton and it flying over the first two rows and making a kabob out of my children.
Yes! This is the kind of thing that is taking over my thoughts during church. It's that distracting. It makes me feel like I'm in an orchestra pit, or a marching band...but definitely not at church, preparing to participate in a sacred ordinance.
Don't get me wrong, the conductor, she's fine. Nice lady. HUGE baton. Any baton is a problem for me, honestly. But this one just needs to go. But not her. She's nice. Nice enough that I would never tell her how much I loathe her baton, because it would hurt her feelings.
And also because then I would be admitting how crazy I am.
I probably shouldn't have admitted this. Now the rest of you will be distracted, too, when you look up during the sacrament hymns and see a huge baton waving around at you. Even if you don't find it offensive, like I do, you'll still end up distracted because you'll be thinking about me, and how I must be going crazy up there on the third row...where that dang baton seems even larger from my vantage point since I'm seated so close. But, I figured I'd better admit my pet peeve after all...because more important than my urge to whine, I needed to warn you. You've all been tipped off and should I fall paralyzed under a spell and turn to stone from a misfired petrificus totalus during the closing hymn next week, you know where to place blame.
9 comments:
HA! I have never seen this. But I sit on the other side so I think maybe it is blocked by the podium. Try my side. But I never look at the conductor anyway.
haha. our conductor doesn't use one (really what is the point?) but I think it may be because she is too old and feeble to hold it up.
LOL. I've never even noticed a baton. What does that SAY about me? I guess my seat in the back row of the overflow is perfect.
it says you all aren't crazy, like your friend, Meg.
I know it's just me. The baton has always bugged me. Our chorister growing up used one. Hers was tiny and silver. It bugged me, too...but nothing like the Harry Potter wand of a baton we've got going on, now. It's just ridonculous.
Haha...this reminds me that last week I was conducting and did not even notice that our chorister did not show up...I opened the meeting, the organ began to play and I looked up and to my horror, there was no one to lead the congregation...I tapped my counselor on the knee and he got up and started waving both arms...the congregation was in stitches! Needless to say, during the song, I invited a sister with musical talents up to lead the rest of the hymns. I need to get me one of the pocket-extender-batons, just for good measure!
oh man...I noticed, and got excited because i love the baton.
I haven't even noticed. I can even say that I don't know who the conductor is. I must not pay attention. Now that I know, I am going to look for it.
I'm with Darcie. I can't even remember who the conductor is let alone the baton. In my ward growing up our neighbor was the conductor and led the choir forever. He had this funny little baton that drove me crazy. He just looked so ridiculous waving it around and he got really into waving it. To this day I can't take that man seriously because of the baton waving.
i don't think you're crazy or maybe i'm just crazy too. the baton would totally bug me. when i was a kid the chorister from another ward used a baton. my brother and his friend were standing outside of the back door or the chapel waving their arms in a mocking fasion. right in the middle of the song the chorister handed his baton to the person sitting behind him, ran out of the chapel, grabbed my brother and his friend, yelled at them and took them to their parents. He was out of his mind. so maybe i just think people with batons are all lunitics.
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