September Speed

1) orchestra things

My teens have amazing opportunities to attend and/or participate in extraordinary arts experiences. Corbin and Quincy both were given “optional assignment” to attend very cool non mandatory orchestra events this week. Reese also attended one on a date with a cello playing friend in our ward, and since I was there with Quincy (and my sister Amy who is in town, hollah!) I obviously did what any creepy stalker mom would do and texted her from a few rows back where I was sitting. 

2) speaking of dates, the social lives of my teens is picking up speed and every weekend is now a scramble to see who has plans abc where everyone needs to be. Reese bravely went to the Bella vista haunted house with Bradley last weekend and survived. This girl does not do scary stuff and has never even been in Bradley’s own backyard haunted trail. Taking her to be chased by creepy clowns Weil sing chainsaws was probably like the episodes of Ellen where she sends her producers through. 😂😂😂😂


You bet I snapped a pic of her at the concert, too. 


3) soccer season is in full swing! Mondays, Thursdays Saturday mornings AND evenings are all devoted to soccer games for Corbin and Soren. Soren is loving his season. Corbin’s coach is a screamer and I fear he will have a coronary during a game. Surprisingly, the screaming is well received by the players parents—they are screamers, too. They take notes abd faithfully deliver them to coach after the game, man-splaining to each other where each one of their kids went wrong and failed the team. The team has not only nog won a single game, but they are getting destroyed by the opposing teams every time with scores like 2-12. Corbin is mot loving the season because it takes the fun out of it to be so focused on wins that you lose sight of the game. Hopefully the boys will rally some friendships together and start working together as a team to enjoy the game a little more. 


4) I grew these gorgeous bell peppers! 


5) Adrian’s fire truck of the day. “That’s grandpa hal driving and me sitting behind him” 


6) we thought our annual foster care re-evaluation meeting was last month, but apparently that was just a quarterly resource worker visit and they scheduled a separate eval for today at 1pm, along with a monthly caseworker visit with the twins at 5. At 12:40 the 1pm appointment canceled. The 5pm visit was the worker who has also been doing the quarterly visits AnD supervising our weekly court ordered sibling visits for the twins. It’s overkill abd everyone knows it. But here we are, asking “how high” when someone holds up a hoop in front of us.  Today I asked the 5pm worker if she could just hand deliver our mountain of forms to the resource worker and save her a trip. 

The response wasn’t because they also have to do a or of the home. 

“But you did a tour when you came a couple weeks ago for a quarterly. And you are here now. 

She needs to do the tour. 

Whyyyyyyyy

Why the tape measure? The dimensions of bedrooms had not changed in the last year. It had jig changed in the last 5 years we have need doing this.  The distance from the entrances of the bedrooms to the smoke alarms has not changed. The house burned to the ground and the dimensions did. Not. Change. This is not an efficient use of time or government money. Take my forms. Spend 1 hour searching for a managing children with aggressive behavior workshop for me. Take 10 minutes and search court connect to see if the appeal has an opinion posted yet. That’s what I need. Resolutions. Not tape measures, 5pm visits that trigger the children and canceled mid day appointments that I’ll have to reschedule by  next week and sweep my floors again.  The weeks of a foster parent are long right now. This is a tough season. 

7) this was a cute father son moment. Aaron is such a wonderful father. 

8) good homemade salad alert. Wild rice, rotisserie chicken, romaine, and homemade Dijon vinaigrette. 


9) mother daughter book club is the best! We read Scythe this month and it was very different  (dystopian) than most other books I’ve read lately but I  really liked it! We FaceTimed Delaney for a minute (she is now off at BYU) and Finley won the door prize—-a handmade Harry Potter quilt that katie just whipped up in her extra hours of the day like it’s no big deal! The coolest!!  We also geeked out over her adorable book cover edible cupcake toppers! So fun! 






10) the hay is in the barn! I snapped this pic during the longest training run last week. 12 miles done. Now short mid week runs and an 8 miler and taper off for the Bentonville  half marathon in a week and a half!  This will not be my fastest race. It might be my slowest race ever. But I’ve powered on through flare after flare of swollen adrenal glands and extreme fatigue.  I’m slower than ever but I’m still moving so that is a huge win. Training for this race was about perseverance. I kept thinking that running in this crazy summer heat would get easier or I would get faster. Neither happened, but I’m proud of myself for just slowing up to train again and again. Especially without the training group and running coach.  I meet up with friends for some runs (y’all know who you are and I am so thankful for you!!), but 90% of my miles have been alone, this time. It’s different and difficult and I’m doing it. 

11) thank you, Sully Shaw for the new to us favorite sweatshirt! He passed it on to Corbin, who also outgrew it over the summer. Reese and Quincy have also taken a liking to it and the sweatshirt (and it’s red look alike) are in high demand. 


12) when your best friend teaches seminary, you get to have a lot of awesome gospel discussions!  Kasey thoughtfully drops off little props or handouts and shares ideas and printables with the Willy kids and I love it! Her enthusiasm had taken our come follow me game to the next level, lately! Thank you, K! Here are my boys “girding up their loins”. 




13) I surprised my parents before they came back to town by giving their flower bed a makeover. I moved the stone edging to make a little retaining wall, and filled out with favorites like cone flower, mums, blueberries and blackberries, then spread 6 bags of mulch in there. The result is so fun and colorful! Hopefully the flowered will spread abd come back bigger and better every year! 

14) why does Soren look like a teenager all of a sudden?! 

15) I was charged with creating covid-friendly healthy snacks for a yw boating trip. I made mini snack trays for all the girls and they were a hit, I also added cookies, chips, and sodas to each boat because balance. 


16) I’m on week 4 with a broken dishwasher. T minus 8 days until the new one arrives. I broke down and bought disposable bowls and plates to survive the hand stretch. Hand washing dishes is the worst. 

17) I took this pic of Sloane on 9-11. I love the juxtaposition and I think the future is in bright hands. 

Happy 6th Birthday, Twins!

I’d give anything to have been there when they were born, for them to have been “mine” from the beginning, for them to be legally “mine”, now.  They keep me running full speed every day and I’m forever in love with these two cuties who stormed into my life to make us all laugh and stretch us and teach us a higher love. These little bobbins are fun, busy, insightful, resolute, affectionate, and so incredibly beautiful that the internet will break the day their photos can be shared.  Happy 6th Birthday, twinners!

20 years later

The girls discovered my wedding dress in the guest coast this weekend. It has some greying and stains from the fire and definitely still “smells like the fire”, but I’m still so happy to have it because I would have loved for the girls to be trying on my old prom dresses this weekend while we searched for HOCO dresses. 

They convinced me to try it on 20 years later. It was hilarious. 

Don’t be deceived, it doesn’t zip. Not even close. Not even close to close. Reese used the words “if I pull any further I’m afraid you’ll pass out” and Quincy asked if zippers can break under pressure. Hahaha we had a good time though.  Reese put it on and made me weep. I was 18 when I bought my wedding dress. She is not far behind, so it fit her teen bride body much more accurately than my “almost 40” body. I loved both. 

I took a cute little interview video of Reese telling me that her future husband will be funny, in tune with the Spirit, loving, and obedient and they would marry in the Bentonville temple and, of course live nearby forever.  It’s the cutest, 

Vaxxed Again!

My student transfer records are currently on hold at UArk because I haven’t submitted proof of immunization. Welp when your house burns to the ground, you unfortunately lose vital records like your 39 year old childhood vaccine card. So after spending a full day on hold with Kaiser trying to request a digital copy of something that does not exist in digital format, I was told I’m sorry outta luck and scheduled an appointment to go receive another round of childhood immunizations 🤣. 

I was venting my frustration over this speed bump to Aaron, and whining about the inconvenience of waiting until October to even know what credits transferred so I can create an academic path to follow, and he started calling a few local Walmart pharmacies. Third time’s a charm! He found one with MMR and Tdap in stock, which are the two vaccines required for University registration. 🎉  Here I was feeling proud of myself for finding a way to get things done, but complaining about the pace of the process. And then there’s Aaron, who sees my dissatisfaction and decides to try to do something about it. I love him and I’m so grateful for him.  

Also, hooray for vaccines.  

I scrolled through photo after photo on social media of 100k football fans gathered in Lavell Edwards Stadium for the BYU v Utah “holy war” and they’re all rushing the field in glorious celebration of the long time coming BYU victory. It made me SICK to see everyone shoulder to shoulder hugging and cheering and crammed in there like happy sardines with NOT ONE MASK in sight. 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ This is at a church owned school! I did not even attend BYU, but I felt a sting of disrespect to a sanctified building to see the masses outwardly disregarding counsel from a prophet of God. Did none of those 100k people read the first presidency message urging the Saints to fight the WAR on covid by wearing a mask where social distancing isn’t possible?! BYU football isn’t a special exemption.  I’ve already been in the position where unvaccinated individuals gave one my children pertussis. Twice. It was horrible both times.  So it feels personal when others choose the thought that their decisions do not affect others.  The photos of cougar fans celebrating hit me hard and looked like a great and spacious building and I was pained for every loved one in the crowd.  As a member of the church and as an immunocompromised member of society, I need to put my energy into practicing forgiveness and choosing not to be offended by the insensitive disobedience of others. This weeks come follow me message was just for me. It was also “court week” so after reading all sorts of slandering reports I am needing this reminder today. 

So kids, here’s a pic of your mom leading by example and following good health practices by getting another round of immunizations because while I am justified in filing an exemption (I mean it’s not my fault my vaccine record is ashes) I believe it’s better to just err on the side of caution to protect the community as a whole. 💪🏼💪🏼

Happy Birthday Soren!

Happy 9th birthday to Soren!! We celebrated him with a tower of donuts, a switch game, a new soccer ball and cleats, a dog man t shirt, and two dog man stuff yes (cat kid and 80HD). We love you Soren!   

Quincy Speaks in Sacrament Meeting

I copied and pasted the talk Quincy wrote to give in sacrament meeting today.

In 2016, Elder Jeffrey R Holland said, “If we give our heart to God, if we love the Lord Jesus Christ, if we do the best we can to live the Gospel, then tomorrow-- and every other day-- is ultimately going to be magnificent, even if we don’t always recognize it as such. Why? Because our Heavenly Father wants it to be! He wants to bless us. A rewarding, abundant, and eternal life is the very object of his merciful plan for His children!  It is a plan pred-i-cated on the truth “THAT ALL THINGS WORK TOGETHER FOR GOOD TO THEM THAT LOVE GOD.” 

I would like to give some personal applications of this truth to you today.  

A few years ago my family experienced a series of traumatic events that led to me developing debilitating anxiety.  Excessive worry, fear, rage, and overwhelming grief affected my ability to function. And honestly I was not a super delightful person to be around. Although I did not choose these hard trials, I recognize that they were part of a process that taught me self control and made me a stronger and more empathic person over time.  

Instead of talking about the trials, I would like to share a few of the blessings that came from this process that testify of the truth that “all things work together for good.” 

First, some sisters in the Relief Society followed promptings from the Spirit and decided to  minister to me through friendship.  Even though they were adults and not my family members, they totally became my besties and showered me with love and took me in as their friend.  

Their impact on my life was influential and a very real reminder to me that I am loved and  Heavenly Father loved me and will always send me help. 

Some ways I sought out guidance were through prayer and attending the temple to do baptisms for the first time.  I was given a Father’s Blessing from my father, and a Priesthood blessing from my Bishop. In this blessing I was counseled to become a better personal record keeper through journaling. Journaling is still something I love to do when I want to relax. 

My mom did a bunch of research on trauma and we worked together using what she learned to help me understand what I was going through.  She was a constant presence during some really intense panic attacks.  This process really helped us to bond and fortify our relationship to be even stronger than it was before.  She also taught me about my ancestry.  My great grandma, Myrtle Tenney, also experienced anxiety and depression after a series of significant trials.  I learned about how she spent her life faithfully serving others and chose to not be hardened by the burdens she bore. I am thankful for the example of the strong women who came before me and for the closeness I felt to them.   

There is a song on my favorite radio station (air 1, check it out guys) with lyrics based on the scripture Deuteronomy 31:8. “And the Lord...doth before thee; He will be with thee, He will not fail thee, neither forsake: fear not, neither be dismayed.”  I love that this song says (and I won’t be singing it for you) “I know who goes before me, I know who stands behind, the God of Angel Armies is always by my side.  

George Q Cannon once taught: “No matter how serious the trial, how deep the distress, how great the affliction, [God] will never desert us.  He never has, and He never will. He cannot do it.   It is not His character to do so.  He will always stand by us.   We may pass through the fiery furnace; we may pass through deep waters; but we shall not be consumed nor overwhelmed.   We shall emerge from all of these trials and difficulties the better and purer for them.” 

During this time of trials and uncertainty in my life, I attended a series of therapy sessions.  I worked hard to develop skills in recognizing anxiety and what the triggers are and I practiced methods for copeing.  All of these things had a greater purpose for good.  I benefited so much from these tools that I still use several of them in my daily life and routine.  I have had a lot of opportunities to share what I know with others.  I am good at helping my own siblings when they are struggling, and just recently,  I was in the right place at the right time to help a friend who needed exactly the tools I had worked so hard to master.  Sharing these skills with another peer changed my perspective on how the Lord uses both our trials and our triumphs to bless others.  This summer I was able to go out into the community and do some service hours assisting another local therapist in helping teach young children with trauma these same copeing mechanisms. 

The things I have learned from passing through very difficult situations have become an important part of who I am. My trials included an unfathomable amount of loss and unexpected trauma. But bearing the burden of grief has given me gifts that will last much longer than any of the temporal or material things that I lost.  

Elder Holland continued to encourage us with this message, “So keep loving. Keep trying. Keep trusting.  Keep believing. Keep growing. Heaven is cheering you on today, tomorrow, and forever.”  

I wish I had written that. 

Isn’t that so good. 

I would like to add my testimony to his loving words that this principle is true and everything will work out. Because of the Atonement, Jesus Christ understands everything we ever have and ever will experience.  He is here for all of it and we are never alone, and will always stand beside us, I bear this testimony in the name of Jesus Christ Amen. 

Wet Willies

The Rogers Aquatic Center is called Wet Willies. Naturally, we had to go take a dip on the last weekday of summer break.  We spent a few hours slipping and sliding, floating in the lazy river, swimming, playing water basketball and doing the obstacle course. it started to get crowded and “felt Covid-ey” so decided to break for an hour for food, and on our way back to the pool, the sky lit up, then cracked open and released a downpour in a wicked wild thunderstorm.  We made it home, the late afternoon sky was black and the temp dropped 29 degrees in one hour! It began to hail, and Adrian suggested we dry off, eat cookies, and watch Home Alone. Yes. Excellent idea.